Since this our group blog and I discuss most of this stuff with you I'm feeling the need to "talk" about the 2 deaths I've encountered this last month.
I can honestly say that I am at peace. This may sound weird, but a year or two ago I might not have handled this last month well. The death of a neighbor's baby to SIDS and the sudden death of a college friend are enough to send anyone into a deep bout with questions. Questioning why God could allow for such events. Why does one family, mine, get to enjoy our beautiful baby boy while our neighbors lose their little girl at 2 months? Why does a 32 year old have a stroke? Why does it claim his life after days of body improvements and hope from his family? These are the questions that can easily shake someones faith.
However, with the discussions we've had I am not focusing on these unanswerable questions. I know that God has a plan for all of us. I also know that death was not in God's initial plan. This is why we should all strive to live a holy, peaceful, sin free and full life. I know easier said than done. But all worth striving for. And if not now...at least we have purgatory. Right?
I'm choosing to focus on the love I feel for both of my children. I'm feeling blessed to have the family I do. Prayer for the mother, father, and big brother of the baby is what I'm focusing on for my neighbors. (I also had to make them dinner during the initial grieving process because that's what I do. This is why the 2nd chapter we're on right now describes me!)
Instead of focusing in on the loss of a life far too soon, I'm remembering the joy I felt with my friend Eli! His life touched so many. His talents and humor were never unnoticed. He had a way of lighting up any room he was in. He didn't even have to be in a room for the environment to feel a little brighter. I morn for his family! As a mother I now empathize with his mother. How hard must it be for her to be in the spot she is now? But then I think, she was blessed with 32 years of joy with her son. This is more than many other receive.
Thank you for the lessons I've learned from other mothers of faith. I hope that as we all cope with losses in our lives we will continue to focus on the joys and the great mysteries that surround us.